Postpartum recovery with a sick baby makes it very difficult for a mom to address her physical, emotional and mental wellbeing. Today, I’m going to share with you my experience of having a sick newborn and ideas on how to get through it, get past it and most importantly, get over it.
Having A Sick Newborn
Our son was born at 41 weeks and 6 days, weighing 10.5 lbs and 22 inches long. He was gorgeous and aced his APGAR score and hearing tests. We were discharged 3 days later with a comprehensive list of after delivery care.
Once home, we noticed that he wasn’t gaining weight and was extremely sleepy and lethargic. On our third visit to his pediatrician in 7 days, we were advised to take him to an ER immediately. We rushed our son to the nearest hospital for sick children, where he was admitted to the Pediatric ICU. The diagnosis: a UTI (an incredibly rare condition in a circumcised baby boy) that had become septic.
What followed were very long days. We endured him getting poked for blood draws, undergo a spinal tap and be hooked to multiple machines. He was admitted for 40 days on high dose antibiotics that were administered through a PIC line. Suffice it to say, it was not the storybook experience one imagines.
I thought I was prepared for my postpartum care. I had the sitz baths, the witch hazel pads, and my other postpartum supplies ready. Then this happened.
How To Get Through It
You get through it because you have to. There is a little baby depending on you, who needs your touch and your nourishment to feel better and get stronger. The three things that helped me were:
- A solid support network. My husband was my rock through the ordeal. He was there every second, kept me calm and made sure that I ate and slept properly and got plenty of breaks. We also had family and friends and a doula who stepped up and were there for us.
- Your postpartum recovery is hugely dependent on you giving your body a ton of TLC. Don’t deprive yourself of healthy and nourishing foods. Staying hydrated by drinking lots of fluids is also key. Taking care of your food and water intake means you can do a better job of providing the same for your baby.
- Escape: It’s understandable that you don’t want to leave your sick baby. But it is imperative for your mental and physical health to leave the hospital, get some fresh air and take a break from caregiving. Many women are prone to constipation during their postpartum recovery and not enough movement can really exacerbate the problem.
How To Get Past It
I found the mental hurdles of postpartum recovery with a sick newborn so much harder than the physical. A tremendous amount of guilt accompanies your baby getting sick. People ask questions like, “did you not drink enough in your pregnancy?” and create doubt and questions.
You have to tune others out and only surround yourself with people who are supportive and positive. Not drowning in guilt is the most important step in getting past your experience. You have to focus on the mental part of your after delivery care as well as the physical to truly recover.
How To Get Over It
The first step towards getting over it is bringing your healthy baby home. Building routines that are normal and not dictated by hospital policies help reduce the trauma of your earlier postpartum recovery experience. I remember crying like a baby the first time I rocked my son to sleep without any IV’s attached to him.
You also have to recognize that the emotional trauma of your experience may manifest in different ways. I started rushing to the doctor every time my son sneezed because I was so scared. It took me time and help from my family to realize that I was letting fear dictate my parenting. Being self-aware is very important and asking for help when you’re unable to figure it out on your own will help you parent in a healthy way.
My son just turned 6 in November and he is the light of our lives. He loves sports, superheroes and his little brother. It has been a long time since I looked at him and remembered my harrowing postpartum recovery. Instead, he is my constant reminder that babies are so very delicate but also incredibly resilient.
Hafsa is a serial entrepreneur and blogger at The Mindful Glutton. Amongst her ventures are designing children’s bedding, faith-inspired greeting cards and building websites for small businesses and bloggers. She lives in Chicago with her husband and two munchkins and shares glimpses of her life, adventures with her Instant Pot, beauty and productivity tips for busy moms on Instagram @themindfulglutton.
